I’m still on the wagon. I don’t know why I didn’t write for over a week…perhaps embarrassment? So many people inquired if I had a drinking problem…and I couldn’t properly explain/convey that I just needed to hit a restart button on my life.
And I have. My entire life has changed in a mere two weeks. And tonight was the first night I journeyed into a bar with a client to test myself…*relief* there I sat with ginger ale in my champagne glass. I’ve never felt more powerful…so maybe I do have a drinking problem…or, maybe (let’s spin this positively), I finally have willpower.
Things haven’t happened like I expected though. For starters, I thought I couldn’t remember things because I’d been drinking…turns out, I just have a really foggy memory. Need to start popping ginkgo biloba and working those crossword puzzles to get my mind going. Secondly, I didn’t lose weight overnight, which shocked me to the core considering I’m saving all those empty alcohol calories AND going to kickboxing an hour every day. Let’s hope it’s muscle. I’ve actually gained a pound, go figure.
But the most important thing is that my real friends are supportive. And not in a “oh cool, good luck” sort of way. They cheer me on with texts daily. They gush over my progress. They ask questions about my journey. I am in awe, humbled, and surprised that they care about me this much. I feel blessed. And, no, I’m not doing the humble brag #blessed…their kindness has made me reevaluate everything.
Aside from no booze, no boys and exercising, I’ve focused on my bucket list – the ultimate source of happiness for me. Last week alone, I voted in my first mayoral election, painted a blue line in front of my home to show my support of the Memphis Police Department, returned a lost dog home after posting his picture on social media, and competed in the M-Azing Race.
I also finally cleaned out my closet this week…which doesn’t sound glamorous or even worthy of being on a bucket list…but it has been on my to-do list for two years now and deserves a celebration. Must be that sobriety, y’all.
“So this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I’m still trying to figure out how that can be.” – The Perks of Being A Wallflower